I decided to make this post be an instruction one for fucktards. I will explain to you what to do before getting a dog and what to do in general terms once you’ve decided to ruin it’s life. Pay attention dummies.

Pick a breed in advance that you like and do some actual research. All dogs are different, some have different needs and common sense is… that you need to find one that matches your personality. For instance, don’t own a dinky one floor ranch style house with a small yard and get a big Lab because they are so cute. A Lab needs to RUN, it needs space, and cramming it in a small house is a little cruel and blatantly stupid. A Lab is a working breed, it needs a job… or it needs to have something to do. Trying to take a Lab out on a leash to go potty without letting it run and be a dog….. is cruelty to the animal. I have literally known people to do this…. But they’d act “shocked” when any chance the Lab got… it slipped out the front door to RUN through the neighborhood.  Duh… don’t get a dog that requires MORE than what you are willing to put in to it. Since all dogs have different needs you should do research to find one that matches YOUR lifestyle. In other words… if you are a coach potato… then get a lazy dog too.  It’s works out better if you are BOTH lying around getting fatter.

Expect work no matter what the dogs age is… and expect 100 times more if it is a PUPPY. We’re all suckers for puppies, and anyone who isn’t is probably storing a few bodies in their refrigerator. Puppies are ALL CUTE. But God Damnit: they take as much work a human baby. It’s not a joke or exaggeration either. They will cry at night. They rely on you for food. You have to clean up after them. You don’t GET to take your eyes off them for several months, until they are fully trained. Don’t bring a puppy home and then be so stupid that you don’t realize the commitment you have made. Tons of young dogs end up being returned to breeders, or given to shelters because the people who got it were too fucking lazy to put the work in.

You are responsible for teaching a dog to be a good member of society.  Train the damn thing. Take your dog to obedience classes. Be the dog’s leader and owner… not their buddy, mommy, or playmate ALL the time.  Teach your dog MANNERS and how to behave. If you cannot control the dog… it is YOU… not their fault.

Expect to PAY big bucks while owning a dog. They cost a lot. There are vet bills and medical things you MUST NOT skimp on such as annual shots. You will most likely out live your dog too fucktard… unfortunately. That means it will get old, sick, and terminal sooner or later. Once you make that commitment, stick with it. Take care of that animal like a family member and get it treatment. But don’t torture the creature and make it siffer because you are a big crybaby wimp. You must remember that you will either watch that animal die, or you will have to put it to sleep when it begins to suffer. I have seen countless people in my life do selfish and horrible things like let dogs continue to survive through horrendous health conditions to serve their own selfish needs. No ethical vet is going to make the choice to put your dog to sleep, they will only give you options. It’s up to you to use some common sense. If your dog has no quality of life, and is in pain or is suffering without much hope… then do your beloved friend a huge favor and end it. Animals are not like people in the sense that they even want to continue to live. A dog in nature will go off on it’s own to die. They aren’t afraid of it the way we are. It’s about balance. You don’t put your dog to sleep because they broke their leg, you help it mend. Euthanasia is only appropriate when there is little hope, no quality of life, or pain. Oh and for the dummies….. if it costs $3000 to fix your dogs broken leg, don’t give it away to a shelter. Deal with it. Nothing pisses me off more than a cheap lazy asshole.

Do your dog a favor and PROTECT it. Get a fence. Keep it on a leash in the neighborhood.  Don’t let them run the streets freely.

Don’t leave your dog totally unattended to for hours on end. Crate train your dog. It is NOT cruel to provide a cozy comfy dog den for your friend, and if crate training is done properly then that is what it becomes.

Fucktards are always doing stupid shit like getting pets or having children. Someone HAS to teach them what to do dang it.

OK so I have and use the brand Always Pads.  I open a clean pad out of the wrapper and go to the back to expose the tape. I can see something black inside my pad. WTF is that? It looked creepy enough that I wiggled it and it was stiff. Something was not right, and even a fucktard could tell that. I got a new pad, but I kept the weird one to show my husband later.

A while later we both looked at it, we both had confused looks on our faces. We tore it open. Inside was black tape, kind of like duct tape – for lack of a way to describe it.

Some frickin moron at the PAD factory must have had a quota to meet to maintain their job…. And accidentally cut my pad. In order to cover up the mistake they made they literally TAPED it back together.

Only a man can be this dumb. Not just any kind of man, but an unintelligent one…. A fucktard man. Even a really stupid woman would not commit something THIS ridiculous. I am seeing a fat bald guy with glazed over eyes and puddles of spit at the corners of his mouth. Aren’t you?

No one would believe me unless I supplied proof. So here it is.

Even my fucking PADS are not safe from fucktards. I am getting scared to eat anymore too.

All those stupid “informative” or ‘educational” chain letters you get in email… are bullshit. Please don’t keep forwarding them on because you learned some tidbit of trivia that you didn’t know before. There is a major chance…. That the info is INCORRECT, not to mention it’s a virus or something else. Fucktards take these chain letters totally seriously.

There is one floating around right now for instance about Taxes. It’s some fucktarded poem that some angry poor unemployed person probably wrote…. who also doesn’t want to pay taxes. So they give misleading info by saying that the US didn’t have taxes or a national debt 100 yrs ago. What really ticked me off is some dumb ass also posted it on their blog to help inform their stupid readers too. Therefore, I must rant.

Um it is bullshit that we didn’t pay taxes in the US 100 years ago. Wars have always created a National Debt and we have had plenty. Sure, our debt now is HUGE beyond belief… but the Civil War created one too and yeah, at that time it was very high. And Taxes aren’t just an American issue either jackasses… every country in the World pays them. Duh. Some countries pay much HIGHER then Americans do. The German’s for instance are paying a Restitution Tax for WWII . It comes right out of their pay checks. Oh, they also are taxed a Religion tax too. Didn’t Americans litter our tea in some body of water to revolt against the UK’s taxes? Um I believe that might also be true too (uh yeah that’s sarcasm dummies). I guess we were paying taxes and hoping not to have to do that here. Boy, we sure were idealistic and stupid weren’t we?

The United States began the development of the IRS (it was not technically the same as we have now – for the dummies that might get confused) in the middle of the 1800’s. Um, that’s more then 100 years ago. Cigarettes and alcohol has been taxed since roughly since that time too.

While it is true that in the last 100 years American taxes have dramatically increased… some are really needed if you want nice roads to drive on, if you want health care costs to be semi-affordable, and if you wants losers who don’t pay their taxes to get more fees then you.

Some of the taxes that this dumb chain letter bitches about are:

Corporation Taxes - Um ok. Corporations need to be taxed. They can afford it and they make up a major part of the American infrastructure. People who have any intelligence know that they should be taxed for a variety of reasons.

Property Taxes – Um ok so you don’t want a Police or Fire dept in your community?

Road Usage Taxes – the more intelligent people call this Toll Roads. I guess you don’t want roads?

Unemployment Taxes – So these supply you with an income when you lose your fucktarded job at McDonalds. And we ALL know that you want money when you get fired.

Social Security Tax – Is anyone actually dumb enough to not realize why we pay this? If so, sorry, it will take me way too long to explain it to you.

Marriage License Tax – yeah you gotta pay to get married, but then you also get tax advantages for it. No brainer.

Building Permit Taxes – This allows us to mandate building codes and makes them safer to live and work in. But who really needs that?

There were tons more, basically all taxes listed and complained about. I have a life so it would take me way too long to go over each one.

The email closes out with the statement of 100 years ago fantasy bullshit, but it also sticks in that “women stayed home with the kids” as if implying that made things better too. I guess it did in some ways… but 100 years women had no choices and no rights either. Duh. Progress and growth costs money fucktards. I know that is a hard concept to grasp for you because you normally do not improve your stations in life, and you need someone to blame it on. But yeah, progress costs money. We also have doubled our population of fucktards that need “taken care of’ too. The US is no longer some little melting pot “island” where immigrants can come to hide from their problems in their own land. We aren’t the Land of Hope that we once were, now we seem to be the “Land of Entitlement”. Get over it, and pay your fucking taxes. Shut up and stop sending out chain letters written in ignorance. You only show me how stupid you are. Try using the internet for educating yourself instead. America keeps getting dumber and I could vomit.

However, this got me thinking. Why would a bum need a cell phone? Who is he going to call? Other bums? Obviously he is not calling work – maybe he is calling his family. But then, if he has some family to call on the phone, why doesn’t he do something like, I don’t know, live with them or ask them for money or food. Then I thought that maybe instead of paying the monthly bill, he could just buy food. I also started thinking that maybe I could start a business where I would trade food for the left over minutes that all the bums with cell phones had at the end of the month and resell them for a profit to all of the other fucktards who have to jabber constantly on a phone. But I digress. Then figured that he may have a good idea. I mean after all, if someone needs to get in contact with him, his best option would be a cell phone. It is pretty certain that they could not call his house and leave a message.

I hate it when people feel the need to share their stupid lives for attention. I really HATE it when the ignorant write things and act like they are going to teach you something, and yet all you learn is how much of an idiot they are.

Why do fucktards really think everyone cares about them? 99% of the personal blogs I have seen are nothing but arrogance. No one cares what your opinion is. Oh well… maybe you fucked up family does, but don’t try to make random victims a part of it. For god’s sake… shut up. If a fucktard isn’t babbling away in your face, then they are writing the same crap and posting it on the net.

The absolute worst is when some dipshit comes along to “preach” to you about how to live a better life, or how the way they live their life is the right way. I’m not talking religion (that’s obviously annoying) and I am not talking about the people who are therapists, educators, or life coaches etc. Those are people we may want to learn from. I am talking about the lazy dumb housewives that are on Zoloft writing about what great mom’s they are; while they gently condemn all others…. despite their ignorance.

I have a theory, and if you are not a fucktard then you know I am right. People who write these aimless and useless blogs about their meaningless lives and childish beliefs – a;; need lots of medication. Sure they do, that’s why they have all the time in the world to write that nonsense. They go into one of their manic stages and write endless rants that do not even stay on the original topic. They take loser quizzes/tests/surveys for their blogs and myspace page because everyone is just dying to know these things about them.

The internet would be a nicer place, and I’d be a happier human being if the only people who blogged… could actually write coherently, and had a point. Some people should just not speak or write.