The Dumbest Person Alive
Rainbow is a chick I used to work with and we had frenemy relationship based on that. I am using that false name for her as a snide comment because she thinks she is an artist. She also thinks she has magical powers, so there ya go! She was one of the dumbest people I knew, and I have known some true dummies. I thought I’d post some of her best short stories. Enjoy the stupidity and they are ALL TRUE.
She thought people in Canada and England celebrated Thanksgiving.
She doesn’t know the proper/basic use of the words: see, saw, seen. She only uses SEEN. So when you would explain to her… “such and such was posted on the board for everyone to read” (at work) Her response is… “I seen that but didn’t understand it”.
After the September 11th attack she asked me “where exactly is the middle east anyway”.
We used to get together for breakfast with another girl from work and during Michael Jacksons second arrest for the molestation allegations we started discussing the whole thing, as many people were. When it was time for Rainbow to share her opinion she said… “well I think he is like a retarded person so he just likes being with kids”. The girl with us was 20 years younger than Rainbow… and the expression on her face told me that it was the dumbest remark she had ever heard before too.
She always bragged about what a great cook she is. One day I asked her what she was making for dinner and she said, “Hamburger Helper”!
She once asked a work associate in another state (Louisiana) what month/s it snowed there. She asked her not once… but two days in a ROW even though the woman explained to her that it rarely, if ever… snowed in the south. TWO days in a ROW.
Rainbow once told me on more than one occasion that when she was a child and tested before school that school district told her mother “she was borderline”. I asked what she meant and she answered with… “well, they said, like, I was almost retarded. Shows what THEY know”. I just said “yeah” during her crazy retard cackling.
She went to the doctor for some minor surgery. After the recovery period she asked him if she would have any of the problems she had read about on the internet. The doctor said… “No, you have far more problems to worry about”. She asked me if I understood what he meant. I had to lie and say no.
She went to a message forum for Chronic Fatigue suffers and proceeded to spout off her nonsense advice. A woman was discussing some pretty serious marital issues in her life and Rainbow suggested she get the book “Men are From Mars, Women are From Venus”. She said she got it and a six pack – it really helped her marriage.
She taught her 7 yr old son that he “should feel bad for women because they bleed every month”. Of course he told the neighbors 7 yr old daughter he felt bad for her and why. The kids mother called Rainbow and chewed her out about it. Rainbow said, “oh screw her, she is just an idiot anyway”.










